Ration Reality

What do you get when an atheist, an agnostic, and a Christian start a lol site?

LOLTheist.com

Finally, kids. A lolsite that appreciates my arts!

In the words of … uh, I’m not sure which one of them I was talking to…

It’s a team blog. There are three of us: an atheist, an agnostic, and a Christian. (The Christian started it.) The whole idea started out with a comment in someone else’s blog about something like “God helps those that helps themselves” and someone said “God’s not like some magic cookie, which is too bad, because hey: magic cookie!” Of course that led to, “Who eated my cookie?” and the very first post “God maked you a cookie, but he eated it.” After that, we all just went nuts with the theme and decided it really needed its own blog. That was … um … end of June this year. The site just recently started taking off as more people have come to find out about it.

It’s been hilarious — there are some submissions we’ve posted that were like “meh” and they’ve turned out to be hysterical to someone, and others that we died laughing at that others were like “funnay not found.”

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In the spirit of international brotherhood, the dialogue for the following film has been translated from English
into French, then into German, then back into French, then back into English using a popular translation website.

It’s like totally Shakespearian. (more…)

What we have here, friends, is another fine exclusive from that Deviant fella. 

Deviant: He’s one of them latins 

Guatemala, my land, my country, she smells funny.

I’m writing you–dear reader–for the sake of cultural education. Guatemala is the least known country in Central America, and I have been asked by Bagel to expound the virtue of this, my hometown. Let me preface this by saying that I wasn’t BORN in Guatemala, and that is my story until the day I die.

Antigua Guatemala, a city left untouched by modern convenience. Full of wonder and tourists. Shoot me now. (more…)

This Halloween, I’m going as the crazy lady down the street.

I’ve not been invited to any parties, so I’ll not be needing an actual costume, but I will need these original, budget friendly treats for the home game:

First up:

Vanilla Spooge Nougat (more…)

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Is it wrong to write fictional suicide notes for fun? (more…)

Tony Danza. Lol’d.  Loldanza 4eva!1

y hello thar - I’m Tony Danza

**I move away from the mic - cuz I’m Tony Danza  (more…)

“An epidemic of Dominicans contaminating everything.” (Through the Glass by Stone Sour)
“I am imagining a dark lit place with your place or my face.” (Paralyzer by Finger11)
“Mirror yourself if you can even try. Gaze deep into God’s peepee eye” (October Thorns by Flotsam & Jetsam)
“We built this city on the wrong damn road” (We Built This City by Starship)

What do these lyrics have in common? They all prove that I’m stupid and usually high. Also, they’re mondegreens. (more…)

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Two Surfers showed great skill and bravery on Sep. 11 when they rescued a beloved pet swept into Lake Michigan from a stationary pier. Matt Smolenski and Joe Riopelle witnessed a huge wave break onto the South Pier at Grand Haven, MI, knocking Joe Badgero off of his feet and carrying his medium-sized dog back into the lake.

Smolenski paddled toward the struggling dog and braced her on his surfboard. After paddling against the strong rip current for some time, Riopelle helped his friend and the dog the rest of the way. The dog, described by the Muskegon Chronicle as an “older, mixed-breed” named Shell-B, accompanied Badgero to the pier regularly and is said to enjoy barking at the waves. (more…)