The Great Kat: Worship or Die
ЯR November’s Official Artist: The Great Kat ЯR
She came on like a tale told by an idiot; full of sound and fury, signifying…well, personality disorder, maybe? Born in Swindon, UK, Katherine Thomas was raised in a military family on Long Island. Showing an obvious musical aptitude, Kat began playing classical violin at age 9 and later, believing classical music was “dead”, she strapped on a Jackson ‘Flying V’ electric guitar and flipped the scrip’.
Hello, this is The Great Kat. I can’t come to the phone right now…
In 1987, The Great Kat released her debut Worship Me or Die
Kat’s music was only half the story, though. In the heyday of speed/thrash metal’s commercial viability, she had to do something to set herself apart from the large pack of denim-and-hi-top-clad Olympia Beer-guzzlers that were the speed metal scene. She made it known she had an IQ of 180. She claimed she didn’t want to sell a million records because she didn’t make music “for just any idiot to buy”. She even proclaimed herself the very reincarnation of Beethoven! Visually, she was something of a cross between a Dutch dominatrix and an East Village transvestite club dancer (i.e: leather, chains and heavy make-up being the order of the day). Oh, and she sometimes smeared herself with blood–just for laughs.
Torture Chamber
To get a feel for Kat’s…erm, unique personality, you need only watch this interview from the early 90s. Kat, looking like a ball-busting Little Bo Peep, does some slightly more than good-natured head-butting with the buttheaded host.
It’s really sad that they cut out the part where they both ripped off their clothes and made passionate, soap operatic monkey-love right on the news desk, but I guess Standards and Practices wouldn’t allow it to air. Fucking buzzkillers.
Despite the hyperbole that has followed The Great Kat through her career, she is the real deal. She is a graduate of the very Fountainhead of musical academia, the Julliard School of Music, where she was awarded the prestigious Hufstader Scholarship for musical theory. She was a Carnegie Hall-featured solo violinist and toured the world both as a classical violinist and heavy metal frontwoman. Recently, she was named one of the “Top Ten Fastest Shredders Of All Time” by Guitar One Magazine and, decades on, the style of classically-inspired metal inspired by Yngwie Malmsteen, Uli Roth and Kat is still going strong.
Metal Messiah
These days, Kat is still up to her old “‘trix”, throwing down 18th century piano- and violin melodies over slamming guitar riffs with no let-up in sight. Her latest album, Wagner’s War
“The Great Kat is on a LIFELONG MISSION to UPDATE YOU MORONS with CLASSICAL MUSIC, by mixing it with BRUTAL, VICIOUS, MIND-BLOWING VIOLENT METAL AND EAR-PIERCING, FINGER-BLISTERING SHRED GUITAR!!!! Go to the Kat web site at http://www.greatkat.com and HEAR SHRED/CLASSICAL MUSIC FOR YOURSELVES AND WAKE UP NOW!!!”, states Kat.
You owe it to yourselves to get the full Kat experience, but don’t just take my word for it. Quoth the Kat:
To all MY RATION REALITY FANS AND SLAVES:
Check out The Great Kat’s Liszt’s “Hungarian Rhapsody #2” featured on Jason Bunch’s new comedy film “COMING ATTRACTIONS”—COMING OUT SOON! This INSANE comedy is bringing Shred/Classical to the masses and stars Dennis Rodman, Pat Morita, and more!!!!!!! Check out the “COMING ATTRACTIONS” Movie Trailer at http://www.comingattractionsthemovie.com/trailer.html
NOW BOW TO YOUR MESSIAH!!!!!!!!!!!!
Look for The Great Kat to be shreddin’ her tuchis off (with both bow and pick) on her sanity-defying new DVD, “Neo-Classical Kat”, which features Paganini’s Caprice #24 (extremely difficult for the violin, let alone the guitar: an instrument for which ‘Nini never intended it to be written) and an arthritis-inducing version of “Flight of the Bumblebee” (at 300 BPM)! Then, you know, there’s the submission and groveling part that comes next. You get used to it. Kinda Fun…
Flight of the motherfuckin bumble-bee
(Special thanks to The Great Kat, herself!)
Official Site: greatkat.com
Previous Band of the Month posts:
“I’m appealing to kids.” - Kat.
Hmmm.
I love Kat! I first heard her when I was prolly 11 years old.
Already a metalhead, I bought a mixtape of metal songs at K-Mart. Mental…er, Metal Messiah was on it. I was blown away.
Tom Leykis is, for lack of a better phrase, ’so fuckin’ gay.’
But that’s just my opinion . . .
@ Sissy: Adolescent boys, particularly.
@ FFE: I think that phrase fits very nicely.
Love to see a showdown between her and “Baroque pussy” [and my all time favorite] Yngwie Malmsteen.
Only the devil can play Paganini’s 24 Caprices.
The Great Kat looks like Ann Coulter’s true demonic form. I can’t be the only one who sees a kind of vague resemblance. Then again, maybe I’m just crazy.
@ Stiletto: The magnitude of said showdown would be tremendous. In fact, they could go get a round of drinks and just let their disembodied egos fight it out! For what it’s worth, I’ll play a Jackson King V over a 50 year-old Strat, any day. (Metal wasn’t even conceived of in the 50s.)
@ Cody: Have you ever seen Kat and Ann Coulter in the same place? Hmmm…
Holy crap. I’m in love and I didn’t even know I was a lesbian. Haha.
Excellent, Cody! Damn you are brilliant. They ought to start a reality show just for you - “Devil Hunter - The Search for Satan’s Sluts.”
My brother has a Strat, Soy. I’ll ask him what he thinks of a Jackson King V.
Love this piece. Keep ‘em coming!
AJJ, you are not a lesbian because you would have fallen in love with me first! Damn you woman!
Stil: my what a busy bee you have been this morning. (raccoon noises)
Starbucks French Roast + Amaretto Creamer minus food in the belly = INSANITY!
check and check. I would comment on your blog, but I don’t have my ‘members only’ jacket.
also, Jenkem is finding it’s way into a lot of blogs today. I made sure to link RR’s Jenkem post for the uneducated masses. KW in ‘08!
Jenkem? Please!! What’s so new about snorting and/or drinking your own waste for a buzz???
I’m from Texas..remember?
Yes, Laurie, we all know about your shit fetish.
Starbucks French Roast + Amaretto Creamer minus food in the belly = INSANITY!
Stil: You sure you don’t mean “a shot of amaretto” ?
I drank a bottle of it once when I was a kid. I got drunk, then I got sick. I can’t stand the smell, even of the flavored creamer.
I made sure to link RR’s Jenkem post for the uneducated masses
KW: Where? I don’t see any jenkem on your blog. Just a bunch of rancid shit…
New post up, btw. I was busy today, so I couldn’t post this morning.
sorry, should have clarified, saw a jenkem story on What Pushes My Buttons and I left a comment with a link to your jenkem post.
Got it, KW! Good job, thanks!
WPMB is good people. He links to us alot, so no worries about missing one.
One of the nastiest, even if no nausea involved, hangovers I ever had involved ingestion of five amaretto and 7-ups - great taste,. like maraschino cherry,. but an ice-pick of a headache the next day
Ah yes … amaretto and beer, aka Dr. Pepper. I used to drink those regularly before I became a theoretical grown-up.
Does jenkem give you a worse hangover? Anybody know?
If you do, please for FSM’s sake don’t tell me.
So tired today … Keywork, was that you prowling around the hot tub last night?
We’ve trimmed the tree, so you can’t use it to get to the roof anymore, just FYI.
Thanks alot metro. Yes that was me prowling around the hottub last night. You guys don’t need to worry about cleaning it out for a while.
I just wish you’d quit washing your food in it. It’s like something outta “Deuce Bigalow” out there.
well, excuse me for preferring the ph balance of your pool to Laurie’s saliva. But I can look for another place to cleanse edibles. Also, you may find a human nose in the pool at some point. Sorry, I attacked face on my way over last night.
I keep coming by and looking at this post hoping that magically that a boob has popped out of that corset.
Hasn’t happened.
It’s a really really slow animated gif, SEO. Just keep watching.
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