Ration Reality

hyperbolic excellence

Bagpiping with Tom Corbett

with 21 comments

Learning with Tom Corbett

armpit sex, anyone?
Bagpiping:

Sexual intercourse performed by masturbating the penis in the armpit
of a partner until ejaculation is reached. Syn: Axillary Intercourse

i want that on a shirt!

CafePress: Necessity is the mother of a whore

For info on the family-friendly (closeted) adventures of Tom Corbett: Space Cadet, visit SolarGuard.com.

Previous Ass Cadet comics: 

Future entries will be filed here.

Written by The Bagel of Everything

October 9, 2007 at 6:59 am

21 Responses

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  1. Play ‘Cock o’ the North’ Tom. Play it!

    Frontier Former Editor

    October 9, 2007 at 12:37 pm

  2. I can’t wait for “Tom Corbett: Hanging Brain”.

    Soylent Ape

    October 9, 2007 at 4:10 pm

  3. FFE: Chase me Charlie, I’ve got barley up the leg of me drawers

    Soy: I’ll try to find a match…

    bagel of everything

    October 9, 2007 at 4:59 pm

  4. i’m still waiting on TOSS SALAD. will someone PLEASE toss some salad?

    Arm Jerker J.

    October 9, 2007 at 5:36 pm

  5. I LOVE MY ASS CADET MAGNET!

    Kevin

    October 9, 2007 at 8:07 pm

  6. AJJ: I tried. Maybe I’ll find some more of the original art someday, find a match.

    Kevin: Did you put it in your butt? If no, you should put it in your butt.

    bagel of everything

    October 9, 2007 at 8:16 pm

  7. Now this’ll be a fuck in the, wait . . . that’s a shot in the arm for this blog

    Frontier Former Editor

    October 9, 2007 at 11:37 pm

  8. A piper is down..I repeat..a PIPER IS DOWN!!!

    Please make a Tom Corbett Butt Plug!!!! Not for me, but for someone awfully close to me. Her name is LauriAssina Hole!!!

    She’s uh….British..yeah, British.

    LK

    lauriekendrick

    October 9, 2007 at 11:57 pm

  9. I want to buy a Ass Cadet magnet, tell me how I can huh, Bages? Huh Ape??

    lauriekendrick

    October 10, 2007 at 12:01 am

  10. Yea. Yea. I hear ya. But there’s just got to be a way to somehow corrupt the art even more than it has been! Can you just sub a Stan Lee somehow and mesh the two? I’ve got the How to Draw Comics the Marvel Way right here at home!

    Arm Jerker J.

    October 10, 2007 at 12:13 am

  11. @ Laurie: The Tom Corbett: Ass Cadet magnet is designed to look like an authentic, official “ass cadet” patch and is perfect for affixing menus, photos, memos and pornography to most metallic surfaces. This and other fine “Ration Reality” merchandise is available online from our CafePress store. You can even get an “ass cadet” pillow or teddy bear. (No, really. You can.)

    Soylent Ape

    October 10, 2007 at 2:22 am

  12. Ape, you’re a gem..I GEM I tell ya!

    lauriekendrick

    October 10, 2007 at 2:36 am

  13. ass cadet. classic. gave me a very nice chuckle at 6.15 am. which is rare. but id like to take a moment and discuss the “arm-pit jag-off” technique. Ok…if dudes are doing this, which I am sure they are….would the arm pit hair not cause some unpleasant friction? And furthermore even if said armpit is shaved, there is still bound to be a painful stubble situation, right? What happened to the good old fashioned hand job, or the between the thighs pseudo fuck? Arm pit? puhleese.

    spanky

    October 10, 2007 at 5:20 am

  14. @ Spanky: I guess it’s endemic of our society and our growing disconnect with personal relationships and, by extension, intimacy. Or, perhaps, it’s the result of a sexually jaded segment of society looking for some kind of original sexual expression in hopes of getting an extra thrill. Whatever the case, it’s sad.

    Oh, and don’t knock it ’til you’ve tried it.

    Soylent Ape

    October 10, 2007 at 9:22 am

  15. Armpits. They should have dubbed this ‘The Iraqi Handshake’.

    keywork.

    October 10, 2007 at 9:27 am

  16. Well Ill be honest with ya, ill will deff try the “arm pit fiasco”. mainly because I dont have cock and balls so while my arm pit may be sore and my shoulder dislocated…I will not have an angry pee pee. Ill let you know how it all works out…this is a nice tip i can pass along to todays youth.

    “Armpits. They should have dubbed this ‘The Iraqi Handshake’.”

    made me snort laugh.

    spanky

    October 10, 2007 at 10:12 am

  17. if you worked this right you could take 5 cocks at once. not a world record of course, but certainly notable.

    spanky

    October 10, 2007 at 10:13 am

  18. Definately notable.

    keywork.

    October 10, 2007 at 10:47 am

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