Ration Reality

I have a new lamp

Posted in 420, dreams, gifts, lamp, shopping, wtf by The Bagel of Everything on August 25th, 2007

I awoke this morning to find a lamp sitting in my livingroom next to my front door.

It’s kind of a nice lamp, I guess: a white paper lantern on a tall black pole.

Where did it come from? I’ve never seen this lamp in my life. Did I steal it in my sleep? Did I buy it? I’ve not bought a new lamp in like… hell, I’ve never bought a new lamp!

Anyone missing a lamp?

Oh, and kids… The comic is late. Jesse, the artist, has been ill. Goto his page and taunt him. He won’t be able to defend himself for days!

11 Responses to 'I have a new lamp'

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  1. criminyjicket said, on August 25th, 2007 at 12:58 pm

    i awoke this morning to find i was missing a lamp. it was a cheap piece of shit, paper lantern on a rickety post…i think a couple of the wires were bare

    what kind of an asshole would steal a lamp?

  2. bagel of everything said, on August 25th, 2007 at 1:05 pm

    CJ: That’s weird. Hey, wanna buy a lamp?

  3. criminyjicket said, on August 25th, 2007 at 2:51 pm

    naw, i borrowed some candles from sexually deviant neighbors…they smell funny, but they light up the room.

  4. Soylent Ape said, on August 25th, 2007 at 4:40 pm

    Maybe the lamp is Jesse’s?

  5. bagel of everything said, on August 25th, 2007 at 4:52 pm

    Why would Jesse come over and leave a lamp?
    But then, my dog is looking kinda pregnant, so maybe he was here.

  6. criminyjicket said, on August 25th, 2007 at 6:53 pm

    jesse is too sick to carry a lamp…are you sure it isn’t a lighter?

  7. Cody said, on August 25th, 2007 at 11:31 pm

    Aliens. The aliens left it. You know, a kind of post-probing present.

    Either that or you’ve got a crappy neighborhood Robin Hood: steal from Goodwill, give to random people who may or may not need lamps.

  8. bagel of everything said, on August 26th, 2007 at 1:50 pm

    CJ: Are you trying to say Jesse is carrying a torch for me? Yeah, um, no.

    Cody: Ya know, maybe it isn’t a lamp. Maybe it’s a giant alien swab. Kinda looks like one.

  9. criminyjicket said, on August 26th, 2007 at 4:40 pm

    i thought it was more along the lines of “I’d like to joan of arc her”

    can’t remember the exact words

  10. bagel of everything said, on September 14th, 2007 at 12:54 pm

    CJ: That’s what I meant too. Jesse’s kinky like that.

  11. Under a bushel « Ration Reality said, on May 3rd, 2008 at 6:01 pm

    [...] posts: I have a new lamp - Love Carrots - The O-Face Game « Vagina Power vs. [...]

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